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When thinking about sex, worrying about pain is a perfectly normal concern to have! Reena Liberman, MS, a private practice sex therapist in Ann Arbor, MI, explains that intercourse may feel uncomfortable at first, but the pain shouldn’t be too overwhelming.Many girls assume that losing their virginities will be painful because of what they learn about the hymen, a tissue that lines the opening of the vagina. “If it’s the first time having intercourse and the hymen is still intact, it might feel like a little pinch, but it shouldn’t be very painful,” she says.

We spoke with several sexperts to help you better prepare—physically and mentally—for when you’re ready to take the next step.“Foreplay is extremely important for women because that’s when women are most aroused,” she says.“If you jump into intercourse, the woman might not be lubricated enough to enjoy it and may not experience the full pleasure of sex.” Sarah*, a junior at the University of Michigan, also says that foreplay is important.Feel comfortable enough to do whatever feels good.” If you’re thinking about having sex, it’s important to consider the different contraception options beforehand.“I think it’s a great idea for young women to think about contraception before they become sexually active, and even come in and have a consultation with a health care provider who can talk about all of the options,” Ernst says.